boundary

noun

bound·?ary | \ ?bau?n-d(?-)r?  \plural boundaries

something that indicates or fixes a limit or extent.

When usually somebody thinks about boundaries, they think about limitations that nobody would like to have. They think really negative about it and I can relate because for example, since you are a little kid your parents always put you boundaries, also the teachers, etc. Which led you with a bad idea of what is like, but when we go to the other subject which is “Personal boundaries” is different, so here is the actual definition of it.

Personal Boundaries

: are the limits and rules we set for ourselves within relationships. A
person with healthy boundaries can say “no” to others when they want to, but they are
also comfortable opening themselves up to intimacy and close relationships.

Now this specific topic is the one we are focusing on, because even that it has the same word as the first definition this second definition is a lot different than the other. Because what it means is that those boundaries are basically for your own good. This boundaries are the ones you have to choose in personal situations, like decisions you need to make for your own good or benefit.

Here are some examples of how to establish some healthy personal boundaries.

I chose this topic because it is necessary to also know this type of information for your own good. Because a lot of people have problems because they always put everyone first, or they do favors to everyone and sometimes they really need to take care of themselves but they don’t because they are busy pleasing other people, there are other different situations but this is one of them.

Here is a comparison with some rigid boundaries and some healthy boundaries, which those are the ones that we are looking for.

RIGID BOUNDARIES HEALTHY BOUNDARIES
* Avoids intimacy and close
relationships.
* Values own opinions.
* Very protective of personal
information.
* Shares personal
information in an
appropriate way (does not
over or under share)
* May seem detached, even
with romantic partners.
* Knows personal wants and
needs, and can
communicate them.
* Keeps others at a distance
to avoid the possibility of
rejection.
* Accepting when others say
“no” to them.

Remember to care about yourself and choose you first and then the other people or stuff around you. Because is better to have first a healthy relationship with yourself and then focus on committing to other people or stuff.

Keep shining guys,

Kary.