Trip After Trip

Time to cut the crap. I’m not here to tell you guys I’m living a positive or negative life. I’m just living. I’ve made mistakes, I’ve made amazing choices. I’m only human. I can say I’m not where I want to be but I thank God every single day I’m glad I’m not where I used to be. Life isn’t always peaches and cream you know? Things will never come easy. Life is a constant battle with yourself, not just the people who surround you. Like Leonardo DiCaprio said in Titanic: “Life is a gift and I don’t intend on wasting it.” With that saying, I’m proud to say I joined ABADÁ-Capoeira and am enjoying it. Finally doing something outside of the university and house. Another great thing to add? I finally got a job! The best part is I didn’t even look for it, it came towards me unexpectedly and has helped me out bunches financially. Of course I keep going on adventures with friends, that’ll never change.

A lot has happened in such little time. Typical right? One minute I can write about how happy I am then one little dilemma happens and down you go. I’ve learned to just go with the flow with things. You can never force something if it’s not meant to be. Now a days I’ve lost people whom I thought were close to me, no death, just “friends”. You can never call whomever a friend. Whoever I meet from now on I consider them acquaintances because to call something a friend takes time and of course actions speak louder than words.

Okay, I know. I’m also tired of talking about friendship topics since that’s all I would write about. Let’s see. Oh! I reconnected with this one special guy who surprisingly made me change my perspective on things. He’s open minded, spontaneous, has some similarities in music and style, and I know this sounds tacky to most of you but I don’t care. When I look at him, my eyes light up. I like every little detail about him. I don’t know what it is but you guys know I have a big smile, we all know that. I tend to laugh at everything, but when I laugh with him, I catch myself cheesing a little too much and have to go back to that serious face. I always thought he would think: “This chick laughs at everything and she’s strange.” I just can’t contain myself around him at times. Yeah, cheesy I know.

The thing is I haven’t felt like this for a while. I’ve become a sort of cold person and can lose interest real quick and when he and I began going out again, I tried to avoid catching feelings because I wasn’t sure if I knew how to love someone again. Then again, I only loved one guy in my life and that’s way over so the way I currently feel is like I’m starting fresh and I’m honestly happy. For him to tell me he loves me, seeing the joy he has just by my company and bonding, it’s something that leaves me astounded. You know when you like someone so much that when they look at you, you immediately look elsewhere because you get nervous? Well yeah. I still get nervous around him like I did when I first met him. But of course I just go with the flow. That’s how things started anyways, going with the flow.

Sam I am.

You guys must think: “Damn, this girl doesn’t get tired of writing and blabs so much.” You are absolutely right. BUT I have more exciting news. I’m going to be an aunt really soon. Wait what? Yeah, my sister is finally pregnant and will be having a healthy baby girl around April-May. Elena will be her name. This news was the best news my family could receive especially knowing my sister is the happiest. It makes us happy to know she is happy and well. We miss her bunches but it is what it is. Oh, where did she go? She’s been living in New York for some time now. I miss having my sister to talk to, of course here in person. We don’t speak much because we’re both busy but when we do speak, we talk for the longest time ever catching up and gossiping like old times.

Okay okay, this is the most I’ve written but hello, look at the last time I wrote and you’ll understand why. It’s 12 to midnight and I have to wake up super early for college. Thanks for reading. Until next time babes.